it’s only 13.1 miles from hooters to church
March 7, 2008 at 7:15 am | In family, fitness, spirituality | 6 CommentsMy wife and I ran a half marathon last Sunday that was sponsored by the Hooters in my home town.
I had no intentions of running this race, as I had spent exactly zero effort training for a race of this distance. My wife, on the other hand did, and I was there to cheer on my sweety pie. (plus she looks hot in her running garb). We got there early enough to give her time to sign in and stretch with plenty of time for us to chat about how cold it was that morning. We kept warm in the car until just before the race and she made her way to the starting line. Somewhere in the middle of that, I decided that I had no idea what I was going to do for two hours while she was gone…
So I signed up an ran the race. Continue reading it’s only 13.1 miles from hooters to church…
scrapping you children’s childhood
March 4, 2008 at 10:52 pm | In family, father, parenting, son | 3 CommentsI am in the process of changing out my son’s room decor.
You see, he is thirteen now and the Ralph Lauren Denim faux finish that I had on the accent wall and beneath the leather chair rail with the accented belt loops from worn out jeans was no longer appropriate. It made no matter that I hand painted every double stitch line between the 24″ sections of perceived fabric. It was inconsequential that I outlined each outlet and switch plate to look like a pocket on the back of your most comfortable pair of Levi’s. Oh did I forget to mention that I made a loft bed for him, with a desk/workspace underbelly, from scratch out of lumber that I hand selected, sanded, and stained from our local home improvement emporium. Continue reading scrapping you children’s childhood…
love has an aftertaste
February 12, 2008 at 11:17 pm | In family, husband, love, marriage, wife | 4 Comments
I have yet to meet a person that actually likes eating Candy Hearts.
Even with that being said; once Valentine’s Day rolls around, I cannot seem escape them. I trip over the pyramids that are stacked to the ceiling of every retail establishment that I enter. I notice them on the counters of hostess stands across our great nation of eateries. I see them on every hard working Americans desk wedged between their Swingline Stapler and the chrome balls clacking on a string swing thing.
I have seen people grab them by the handfuls and transfer them to some alternate location. I have witnessed people fingering through the assortment to find one that perfectly fits their joke-of-the-minute. I have been a bystander and noticed the disappointing look on a persons face that was remiss in remembering what they experienced the last time they plucked one of these candy excuses into their mouth. Continue reading love has an aftertaste…
the day i came out of the closet
December 1, 2007 at 10:41 am | In family, husband, love, marriage, movies, spirituality, the battle, wife | 14 Comments
Name something that you did but wish you didn’t.
Allow me to rephrase that in the attempt to better capture your attention and increase the chances of you reading on.)
Name something that you didn’t realize that you did until after you did it and looked back at how you potentially just damaged your marriage forever. Something that was so stupid and meaningless at the time, but possibly made a statement that it had the power to permanently scar the bond what you have built with your spouse to date. An action that was so poorly planned and so horribly executed that, if you showed it in slow motion, could be viewed as more painful than Britney’s MTV Music Awards extravaganza.
I will paint the picture for you, but I must warn you of a few things… Continue reading the day i came out of the closet…
ask and you shall receive…just not right now
November 14, 2007 at 2:09 am | In family, husband, marriage, spirituality, wife | 11 Comments“Egg Hut Tree Hack Shin”
Have you ever concentrated so hard on what you were saying that it was unclear what you were thinking when you said it?
I know that sometimes I get so wrapped up in the obvious that I miss the actual message. I can be so concerned with my opinion and what seems logical, that I become vindicated due to my understanding of the given situation. I fight the flow of any other solution, never considering it plausible. Some people call that “Jumping to Conclusions”; others call it “Ambiguity”; but what it really is, is ”Stubbornness”.
“Sea Can’t Higher Dove Fit”
Other times we just had a different idea of what we were trying to accomplish. Our intentions didn’t quite match our impact. In some cases they were polar opposites. We didn’t take time to fully understand our possible audience and the results were disastrous. Continue reading ask and you shall receive…just not right now…
that’s what dad’s are faux
November 6, 2007 at 4:46 am | In family, father, love, parenting, son | 6 CommentsName something that you have never done, have never thought about doing, and could care less if you ever wind up doing it before you die…
For my son it was painting.
I must preface this article by saying that there isn’t anything in, or around a house that I can’t build, fix, or enhance from a do-it-yourself, home improvement perspective. I can change out plumbing fixtures, work on electrical fittings, hang drywall, set tile, hang an entry door, install a garage door opener, set up an irrigation system, install roofing, build furniture, and, oh yeah, paint.
I would go as far as to say that I am such a good painter, that you may even consider it a “super power”. I work a cutting brush like Dare Devil works his walking stick; I roll better than The Caped Crusader in his Bat-Mobile Whip; and when the mood hits me, I can faux paint in almost any technique known to both human man or altered beast. I have ragged on, ragged off, stripped, sponged, stamped, and Venetian plastered just to name a few. I move fast and I work clean. If I were this super hero, you would probably call me “The Amazazaing Painter Man”, “The Super Spreader”, or maybe just “Michaelangelo Got Nothing on Me Stud”. I would fly around town in a paint pelted smock and ward off the “White Wall Gang” with the fury of my mighty Corona brushes. All the while having my nemesis (The Evil Dr. Odorless Mineral Spirits) continually attempt to ruin my plans for a world that complements itself like a properly selected accent wall… Continue reading that’s what dad’s are faux…
a greater tolerance for chaos
October 28, 2007 at 7:37 pm | In family, fitness, husband, marriage, spirituality, the battle, wife | 5 Comments
“Every time I have the opportunity to sin, I have the opportunity to bear fruit of the spirit as well. In a momentary flash; I can choose self-control or allow my eyes to wander. I can choose kindness or let a bit of vindictiveness leak out. What determines which one wins? In my life it’s largely the level of incubation.”
—Ron Martoia , morph! , 2003
Hmmmm…
I read this paragraph in Ron’s book a few years ago, and again a few days ago. Then I did my favorite thing I do when I come across something I want to absorb for a while; I went for a run. A “business as usual” run except I turn down my headphones to a faint mumble (for background filler only), and allow my kooky brain to grind up what I have learned and make it relevant enough to apply to something that I am going through at the moment. Continue reading a greater tolerance for chaos…
how big are your knockers
October 20, 2007 at 9:37 pm | In family, friend, love, spirituality, work | 6 Comments“Sometimes we stare so long at a door that is closing that we see too late the one that is open.” —Alexander Graham Bell
I wrote a blog, about a week ago, that started out with a proposition. I stated that anyone who performed a certain act, could be rewarded by me becoming their best friend for 2 weeks. Not just a regular friend, but a BEST FRIEND.
So, it appears that a few hundred people clicked on whatever led them to my article. I will assume that half started to read and decided not to finish, and the other half were successful in achieving the goal. Of that, half probably didn’t need any extra friends, and a few more just didn’t want ME as one of them. That leaves me with an apparent 25 to 40 new BEST FRIENDS.
But here is the part that I don’t understand…
None of them took advantage of the opportunity. I was not asked to babysit, cut their grass, pet their cat, or paint their house. Not one person asked me for a lift to the store, a shoulder to cry on, or a pot to tinkle in. No one asked me for help, advice, prayer, money, time, love, understanding, or my opinion. Continue reading how big are your knockers…
i spit in your general direction
October 14, 2007 at 4:57 pm | In family, father, parenting, technology | 8 CommentsI will be your best friend for two weeks if you make it through these next two paragraphs without falling into a hypnotic trance of boredom….
On your mark, get set, go…
A “Brain Trust” was the name given to a diverse group of economists, professors, and others who served as advisors to U.S. President Franklin D. Roosevelt during the early
period of his tenure. These men played a key role in shaping the policies of the First New Deal. Although they never met together as a group, they each had Roosevelt’s ear.
The term “Brain Trust” was first coined in 1901 and used in a sarcastic sense in reference to the first American general staff of the U.S. President. In 1932, New York Times writer James M. Kiernan revived the term when he applied it to the close group of experts that surrounded presidential candidate Franklin Roosevelt. The term has since been applied in general sense to any close group of advisors.
I wonder where he got that idea… (click insert, hmmmm) Continue reading i spit in your general direction…
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